We’re sure you’ve been through transitions from an old place to a new place. It might be from high school to college or from university to work or you’ve just moved to a new place. Each time you experience this transition you will undergo a similar pattern which you have become accustomed to. Some places offer orientation sessions while some do not. Sometimes you try to create a new persona and sometimes you just become your usual self. We suggest the latter. In the early stages of this transition, you find yourself breaking your personal boundaries. You might blurt out information too early or you might fake some to conform to your new environment. It’s normal. We’re usually excited or shy or we could be both. We’re going to discuss why you should not be shy when exploring new social territories.
*Disclaimer Notice: We are not teaching you to be a show-off or a cocky b*****d.
1. You make an excellent first impression
First impressions last a long time and it’s really hard to change it. Don’t be the person who shies out of conversations. It’s OK if you don’t start a conversation but don’t ruin another person’s attempt to befriend you. You don’t want to be labelled as the conversation terminator. Being friendly on the other hand gives you greater opportunity to make more friends. In a new social environment, you are yet to discover those who have excellent chemistry with you. Yes, you might get a good conversation going along with one person but later realizing that you both just don’t click together. It’s mutual understanding when this happens and you should not worry about him hating on you.
2. You Have Hidden Talents (Which should not be hidden)
Every team has its dynamics and each member contributes in different ways. If you shy away from every social event or work activity, it is very unlikely for the rest of the team to realize your potential. Unless you can float a car with your mind, Professor Xavier isn’t going to find you. You don’t have to shout out your talent but interaction opens doors to the realization of your talent. When you jump into new social territories, you have to discover your social niche. Only with that, the group (classroom, tutorial group, neighbourhood or department) can become dynamic.
Mel Blanc is a good example for this matter. He was persistent in finding his niche and boy did that change his life and the cartoon industry.
3. Everyone is just as shy as you are
In new social territories, it is most likely that you and the other person are curious yet shy at the same time. Someone needs to break his/her social boundaries. It’s better not to be hoping on the other person to make a move. You don’t live on this planet alone after all. The person daring enough to break this boundary first is usually seen as the alpha counterpart, which is a bonus point if you feel that you deserve to lead.
4. You might share the same interests
Hobbies are a general matter. Football, as we have observed, seems to connect most Malaysians together. Only a fraction of us do not speak football. The same goes for other matters. Photography is also a very popular hobby these days. Unless you speak up or show what you are interested in, you will never find the kind of people who click well with you. These are the people who will lift your spirits from day-to-day.
5. So you don’t end up in a Social Dilemma
There’s a Malaysian saying that goes “Tak kenal maka tak cinta”. It simply means “You will never like/love something/someone unless you get to know it/him/her first”. When you shy out of the group, you start to wonder what they think about you. As much as we like to deny it, we do make a lot of speculations on others’ opinions. These speculations dwindle once you get to know the people around you. Staying in the stranger state will just make things worse for you. You will start to lose your social confidence gradually.